“Orphan care must not be a fad. It must not be something that we look on 5, 10 years from now and say, ‘Wasn’t that awesome?’”

As I tuned into The Idea Camp’s OrphanLive seminar Friday and Saturday, I wasn’t able to give it all of my attention, but I did pick up on a few key lines. But this is one that has resonated continually in my head afterward.

Fads are what I do. For a year I’ll swear how much I love one exercise routine only to become hopelessly devoted to another the next year. I change my diet to eat more naturally, go all gung-ho for a time only to relax and focus my meals on other aspects. I sew half a dozen little girl dresses, then bags, then aprons… Red-lights, sitcoms, knitting, plaid skirts, Blockus, multiple earrings, sketching, 80s pop music, dollhouse decorating,  brown lipstick,  Dr Horrible, jelly shoes…

And now orphans. (I understand the clear distinction between the value of people and superficial trends. I merely attempt to example the fickle nature of my mind.)

I fear down to my deep core that I will forget them… I feel I barely know them, I’ve only seen the tip of the iceberg, and yet I am in so much danger of going back to my day to day, my griping over leftovers and making lists of dresses and shoes for the upcoming season. As I struggle to find balance in my American life in comparison to what I am learning I need to also remember that while God is waiting for me to say yes to whatever he has for me on this road, my yes may not look the same as someone else’s. I need to wait and be guided by His Spirit in what my role is.

I know the moments that make my heart twinge and I feel God telling me that those moments are His passion for me. I know that when you ask God to break your heart, he does. I know that I have no idea what to do with the pieces.

I know I ramble a lot!

Oh and this is an AWESOME, currently free audio book that not only has a lot to do with adoption, but I just love how very much of being a Christian is wrapped up in adoption. We are adopted into the family of God! http://christianaudio.com/adopted-for-life-russell-moore

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